Pre-summer day

oh beautiful day. i got a little burnt and super tired from a whole day of sitting outside watching friends play in a volleyball tourney at a local bar. i was super jeleous of not being able to play :( For some reason i'm in a weird mood today. i've been talking to a lot more people lately, i think because i'm working that rec, but for some reason, i feel so ...alone. i feel like i'm missing out. but i cant figure out what i'm missing out on. i dont think i really know who i am yet. still trying to find out who i want to be and what i want to become. most people figure that out in highschool, but no i'm still finding myself. i really want to travel abroad, and i need to make that happen, now that i saw greece in a movie I HAVE TO GO THERE! i dont know if its alone that i feel, but just like i dont fit in. i seem so different than most people and i have a heard time meeting new people and starting conversations. living alone this summer i think will help out, but at the same time, make me even more lonely. but i'm really looking forward to the summer and getting rid of the school stress. it also means more time will pass for luke to come home. i know i've said this many many times, but he is super amazing and i couldnt be more lucky and happier with anyone else. i cant wait to walk down the isle towards him with our family and close friends surrounding us. what a perfect day. i forget what i was going to write on here, i get distracted so easy!
goodnight all